Some time ago on my way home from school, I sat in a taxi cab beside two beautiful ladies- obviously students from my school (University of Professional Studies Accra).
They were conversing all through the journey. They spoke about lots of issues, from challenging courses, to the difficult lecturers and many more issues.
However, something caught my attention from their conversation when one of them spoke about how she wished for a Brazilian hair.
For her, a Brazilian hair and its accessories will make her more confident as she would flaunt it around and will have lots of people around her and also make other girls jealous of her. She made a case of how another girl in her class had all of a sudden become the talk of the class because she now wears a beautiful Brazilian hair and accessories.
The other lady also spoke of how a dark spot which has been on the right side of her forehead (not so visible though) since her birth has been so much a worry to her that she needed to get rid of it so badly because it makes her feel so uncomfortable.
I was so much lost listening to their conversation that I missed my bus stop about a 100 meters before realizing it. I alighted and walked back to my bus stop and then home.
As I pondered over the incident, one thing that occurred to me is how most of us young people erroneously assume that we can derive a positive self esteem from looks and other material things and also how most of us hate ourselves for not being who, what and how we wish we were.
I surmised after thinking through the incident that the major Self esteem problem most of us young people face is not that we’re not beautiful or handsome enough, the problem is that we don’t love ourselves enough and so we keep searching for happiness, acceptance and confidence in good looks and the opinions of others.
I recall how during the early part of my formative years through my sophomore year in the university I always felt inadequate and insecure because of a speech defect I had from birth. I was always sad and intimidated at the least provocation from friends and colleagues. Just like the two ladies i met in the cab, I will always say things like “I’d be more confident and happier if I were like this or that person, or if I had this or that thing.
Ironically, when I get those things I wish for, they don’t make me happy and confident as I thought they would make me. Instead, I always end up yearning for more and more things and in the end get more disappointed.
Fortunately for me, I’ve gone past all that now. God brought my way awesome friends and family who offered their supportive shoulders for me to stand on.
After years of looking for a positive self esteem in material possessions, opinions and approvals of others, I’ve discovered that LOVING AND APPRECIATING MYSELF and KNOWING GODS’ OPINION CONCERNING ME is the only way I can discover my true selfworth.
You see my friends; all our feelings of inadequacy and insecurities are mostly because we do not love and appreciate ourselves for who and what God says we are.
We rather search for happiness and fulfillment in possessions, “good looks”, and approval of others and in the end we get disappointed.
If you’re reading this article and you happen to be in this dilemma, then you need begin reconditioning your mind by soaking yourself in Gods’ truth about you.
The Bible in Psalm 139:15 explains how God design us to his own specification even before we were born. It reads, “You know me inside out; you know every bone in my body. You know exactly how I was made, bit by bit, how I was sculpted from nothing into something.”
You see, you’re not an accident. Long before you were even conceived by your parents, you were conceived in the mind of God and He prescribed every single detail of your body.
He knew so well that only Uncle Mensah and Aunty Adjoa possessed the right genetic make up to create the custom “You”.
God deliberately chose who your parents should be, what color your skin should have, what you should look like, the way you speak and every other feature of your body.
He determined every talent you possess and the uniqueness of your personality. He custom-made you with great precision!
You are who you are, what you are and how you look for a reason. You are part of a labyrinth plan, perfectly and uniquely designed by God.
You overcome that feeling of insecurity and inadequacy only when you recondition your mind and soak yourself in Gods’ truth about you.
Roman 12:3 says, “the only accurate way to understand ourselves is by what God is and by what he does for us.”
Friends, all what I’m trying to say with this article is this, our true self worth is not in good looks, or possessions. Our true self worth is not even enhanced by make-ups or approvals of others. Our true self worth is summed up in my all time favorite quote from Bob Gas which reads, “The most hsolid and enduring foundation for self worth is God’s opinion your life.”
Thanks for making time to read this.
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